The Top 10 Challenges To Midlife Vitality For Women

The Top 10 Challenges To Midlife Vitality For Women

1) As grownups, most of us have actually programmed the possibility for joy out of our lives by seeking a “hassle-free” existence. We are constantly looking for comfort and security instead of something that will challenge and make us grow.

2) It takes a lot of courage to cultivate an attitude of play with the important and serious things in our adult life. But since joy is our North Star, we have to develop the discipline of joy and learn how to play at life again and stop taking ourselves so seriously.

3) Many of us became who we thought we should be according to the standards of others. We became “nice” vs. “authentic” without even realizing it.

4) We are relational human beings and are often afraid of how our decisions will affect others. Consequently, most of us have invested disproportionately in the dreams, lives, and plans of others, while obscuring and detouring our own.

5) Many of us have assumed that we are somehow inadequate and inferior because we aren’t able to achieve, have, or be what we want. Often enough, the problem is not us! We just lack “healthy” life skills, information, guidance, support, and role models.

6) We often avoid conflict and squelch ourselves because we weren’t shown how to communicate our needs and desires cleanly, gracefully, and lovingly – which is all we ever wanted anyway. “There’s nothing that will send a woman to the refrigerator quicker than an inability to stand up for herself.” Cheryl Richardson

7) Most of us never learned how to dress our own wounds. Life is a wild frontier, as well as an exciting adventure. We would never think of going on an extended hiking/camping adventure without having the equipment and knowing how to care for ourselves when get hurt!

8) We weren’t taught how to read our emotions as communication from our authentic self. We weren’t encouraged to listen to ourselves as much as we were advised to listen to others. Often enough, we were encouraged to ignore, squelch, and overcompensate for our strong emotions instead.

9) We ended up being part of other people’s life dramas because we fell blindly into them and it’s extremely hard to detach ourselves once we are in them. However, there are so many of us in this boat, that through supportive communities, we are learning how to raise each other up and experience the view from higher ground – get a broader perspective.

10) Many women are much more comfortable helping others with their problems than helping themselves. When they do start helping themselves and begin thriving, they may find out that some of their friends and family are threatened by their changes. Support is crucial during these times.
Enchanted Blessings ~
Daina (Dinah) Puodziunas

http://www.Midlifefairygodmothers.com

2 Comments

  • By Lizabeth Hammel, November 12, 2013 @ 3:53 pm

    Thank you for hitting the nail on the head,it is really cool to not feel so alone with some of the feelings I have been going through. I am open to learning much more.

    Thanks Liz 56
    Mother of three Grandma of 3 married for 31 years

  • By admin, November 12, 2013 @ 4:03 pm

    HI Liz,
    I’m so glad it made a difference and that you don’t feel so alone with your feelings! It’s a wonderful feeling to connect with others that are going through similar emotions. We need to grant ourselves permission to feel whatever it is that we are feeling so that those feelings can be released.
    Sending Hugs and Enchanted Blessings ~
    Dinah ~ Midlife Fairy Godmother

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